It's all about LOVE

What is your number one goal in life?  How would you answer this question?

My number one goal in life is ________________?  

Think it through.  Whatever the answer is will be your DOMINANT life value/principle.

If your dominant life value is to have fun, then this evening if you get a couple invitations for the evening, then you will tend to choose whichever is most FUN.

If your dominant life value is safety, then you will make sure every decision in life based on the safest choice.

If your dominant life value is to be affirmed, then you will choose things in life that will give you the most affirmation.

It's extremely important what is going to be the most important value in your lfie.

In 1 Corinthians 13.  Let LOVE be your greatest aim.  God says your #1 life value should be LOVE - your highest life value.  The bible said God created everything in the universe for love.  He created us as the object of His love.  He created us to learn how to love.  

Jesus said the most important thing is the "great commandment".  Mark 12:28 

Life is all about learning to love.  Everything else is EXCESS.  One day you will stand before God and answer to how well you loved yourself, God and other people.

Life is all about love.  Love God with all your heart, love your neighbor as you love yourself.

Everything you do must be done with love.  What does that include?  EVERYTHING

Does this mean when you deal with people who attack you because of your faith? YES

Does this mean when you deal with the person at the fast food drive thru that you can't understand?  YES

Does this mean when you deal with people who have different political opinion? YES

Does this mean when someone disagrees with your opinion? YES

1 Corinthians 16:14 - MEMORIZE it - "Let all that you do be done in love."

The day you understand how completely and unconditionally God loves you, you will automatically be more loving, merciful and graceful.  

People who don't feel good about themselves are people are the ones who give no grace, mercy or love to others.  

You cannot give to others what you do not have yourself.  

Next we talk about five things the bible says about love.

1.  We love because God loves us.  All love comes from God.  1 John 4:7-8.  God is love.  The reason why God wants you to love, is because he IS love and he wants us to be like him. If He wasn't loving there would be no love in the universe.  We have the ability to love because we were made in the image of God.  Animals cannot love, rocks cannot love.  Animals have instincts but they do not love the way human beings have the ability to love.  Our two missions while on earth:  Learn to love God and learn to love other people.  God takes the initiative.  When he sent Jesus to earth to die for us, He shows us his love.  

When believers don't believe they are not measuring up to God and feel they don't love God enough, the real problem is they don't realize how much God loves them.  If they realized how much God loved them so extravagantly and unconditionally, they would be automatically attracted to God.  If they understand or felt how much He loved them, they would not be carrying around guilt and condemnation. 

You can't make God stop loving you.  Once you feel the unconditional love, you cut people more slack and give more mercy.  People who hurt others don't feel good about themselves, so they pass it along to others.


Unlovely people are unLOVED people.  If you are feeled with anger and impatience?  You won't be able to love anyone else.  Let God's love heal your heart and let it flow through.

2.  Love is a CHOICE.  Love is a commitment.  You choose to love or to not love.  We do have control over our love.  Attraction is uncontrollable.  Arousal is uncontrollable.  Attraction and Arousal is not love.  They can lead to love, but they aren't love.  Love cannot be forced.  You can't make someone love you or stay in love with you.  You can choose to love God or not love Him.  When a person says, "I just don't love her anymore".  This is a choice.  Don't blame it on circumstances.  You are choosing not to love.  

3.  Love is an ACTION not just a emotion.  Love can cause emotion.  It can create emotion.  Love is not an emotion, though.  Why?  We are commanded by God to love each other.  You can not command an emotion.  You can't command an emotion and have it be authentic, it can be acted.  Love is something you DO and it is an ACTION.  1 John 3:18.  "Let us not love with tongue, but with action."  Acting in love when you don't feel it is a more MATURE love.  It's easy to love someone who loves you, it takes nothing at all.  Real love is when you do the right thing when they don't deserve it, you don't feel it or when they don't respond.  Look at how we sacrificially love our children and take care of them.  Anytime you have held a sick hand for

4.  Love is a skill.  It's something you can get good at.  




to be continued....
notes from Rick Warren's "40 Days of Love, It's all About Love, Part 1".

Awesome power of Focus

10 steps of Godly goal setting.

1. Determine your position.  

Figure out where you are right now.  Where am I spiritually right now.  Where am I financially right now.  Where am I health wise right now.


Whatever you are going to do with your life - get on with it.  Every year is a chance for a new start.

2. Define your purpose

What do I want to be, do or have.  Get a target.  Get a clear, concise and compelling target.  Be able to picture it in your mind.  You won't reach a vague goal.  Being specific empowers you for goal setting.  Why do you want that?
a.  What do I want to be?
b.  What do I want to do?
c.  What do I want to have?

Make the decision and then solve the problems.  Fear will set in after you set the goal.

3. Discover a promise

Your fear will vanish if you can find a promise from God's word.  What promise can I claim.  Which of the 7,000 list of promises in the bible, can I claim?  The more you trust God, the more you make God smile.  He is interested in what you are becoming than what you are doing.  He is more interested in your character than your career.

Before you set a goal...ask these 3 questions.

1.  What is the reward?
2.  Why do I want it?
3.  How will I feel when I reach my goal.

4.  Write down why you want it and how you will feel when you have it.

God made us to be creative.  All creativity comes from God.  When you figure out the "why", God will show you how.  It's a principle of life.

When you figure out why you want to save your marriage, God will show you how.  If you want to become a certain person or have a certain career, God will show you how.  He's interested in your motivation and your heart.

You need to know why you are doing what your doing, when things get tough, you will give up.  Make the decision to move forward and God will teach you the how part of things.  This is where the "trust in me" part comes in.

5. Pray about it.

Mark 11.  Jesus says whatever you desire, pray and believe and you will have it.  God does something when we pray about our goals to test our desire.  God's delays tests our desires.  During the test you ask is this a whim or a wish a true desire.  They let you see how much you are really relying on God. It's okay to pray for success for your goals.  If you have a goal that will bring honor to God and will help other people, you better pray about that goal.  Make prayer a continual part of your process.  

6.  Diagnose the problem.

What are the obstacles that you need to overcome to accomplish your goal?  

Ask yourself two questions?

1.  Why don't I have this already?

2.  What are the barriers?  Financial barriers?  Educational barriers, I don't know how to do this?  They may be relational barriers, people don't want you do it.  Or, you have relationships you need to clear up or settle so you can let go of the past and get on with the future.

The biggest barriers you are going to have in your goal setting are emotional barriers.  They are emotional barriers inside of you that keep you from attempting more than you have ever thought of before.  It's hard for God to get you to think bigger than you have ever thought before.  You have to get beyond the emotional barrier.  Fear of failure?  Fear of success?

What's the best way to handle the problems?  Jesus said, in the sermon of the mount, "Don't worry about tomorrow, take life one day at a time".  That's how you handle giant problems.  You are going to face some big mountains you don't even know about right now.  How do you handle it?  One day at a time.

7.  Design a plan

Design a plan to overcome those problems.  

What's you know what the obstacles are, now you design a plan to overcome those problems.  How do I intend to get there?   Ask yourself how long will it take?  Any planning has 3 parts to it.  When you make a plan, for your business, your family it should have these 3 things.  1) steps.  What are the steps to get there 2) deadline 3) schedule - put it in your schedule.  Write it in your calendar.  On this date, I will have done this and on this date I will do this.

The way you spend your time and your money reveal your priorities. 5% write down their goals and they are also the highest wage earners.

8.  Discipline

Ask yourself, "where do I need to grow?"  The best goals are the goals that challenge you to grow.  Why is God so much more interested in your character than your goal?  You are just more important to him.  The growth in your life is much more important.  

9.  Depend on people

Success is never a one man show.  It always involve other people.  He made us to need each other and to be better together.  God wants us to learn and learn how to love.  Learning how to love others is the number one thing we are suppose to learn.  Rockefeller said the #1 skill he'd pay for in employees is the ability to get along with others.  

Ask yourself, who else can I involve?  Do you need someone to hold you accountable?  Ask them for support.  Ask for their input or advice.  God wants you to be involved in the goals of other people.  Most of the time if you have a need in your life, God will answer that need through a person not a miracle.  He wants us to rely on other people and be in fellowship with others.  He wants us to learn from others.  Other people's prayers will be answered through you.  We grow closer that way.  We can be selfish and isolated if we just have God answer our prayers.

10.  Deposit the price

There is always a price tag for reaching every goal.  There may cost time, money, your reputation or letting go of some things you like to do you may have to let it go.  Letting go of some things for the greater good of others is a what God calls you to do sometimes.

notes from Pastor Rick Warren, "The Awesome Power of Focus

Purpose of Christmas

Purpose of Christmas - Rick Warren

The 1st purpose of Christmas is to CELEBRATE.  - Session 1

GOD LOVES YOU.  God's love is based on who He is.  Not what you do.  John 3:16.  Romans 8:35-39.  Nothing can separate us from God.  NOTHING.  The 2nd reason to celebrate Christmas is GOD IS WITH YOU. God is with you all the time whether you feel it or not.  Hebrews 13:5 " I will never leave you and I will never abandon you".  GOD IS FOR YOU.  He wants you to win.  He wants you to succeed and give your life purpose and meaning.  John 3:17.  God did not send His son into the world to condemn it, but to save it.  Don't condemn the world, point people to the way, the truth and the light.  Jesus didn't come to condemn it, he came to save it.   Jesus came to save us not to scare us!  "do not be afraid".

YOU DON'T NEED TO BE AFRAID.  God says I love you, I'm with you, I'm for you!  That's the good news of great joy!

The 2nd purpose of Christmas is SALVATION - a personal Savior. - Session 2

Statistics show 90% of people pray, this tells us that people recognize there is something bigger than ourselves.

What do you need to be saved from this Christmas?
traffic
chaos
busyness
spending too much money
shopping
inadequacies
family members

Salvation is 3 dimensional:  

1.  Save us FROM sin.  Sin is an attitude, it's a pride problem.  Sin is saying "I want to be my own boss, I don't want to follow God, I want to serve my purpose not yours."  We have these attitudes at different times of our life.  We all fall short of God's glorious standard.  EVERYONE.  Sin separates us from God.  Our sins are the roadblock between us and God, this is why our prayers aren't being answered.  That's why he sent Jesus as a savior.  Jesus came to set us free from our sins.  We need to be set free from ourselves.  We are our own biggest problems...our own reactions and inadequacies that cause us to do dumb things. Welcome to the human race!! Apostle Paul understands, Romans 7:24-25. Answer to our problem - Jesus.  We need a savior.  That's what Christmas is all about.

2.  Save us FOR a purpose:  Ephesians 1:11-12.  God has designs on us for glorious living.  God has a plan and a purpose for our life.  He's had it all along.  As our creator he knows what's best for us.  He saves us for a purpose he wants us to fulfill in our life.  We have to find out how make it come to pass in our life.  You can live at survival level, success level or the significance level.  We were made for more than success.  We were made for significance which comes from God.  Are you tired of living an unfulfilled life.  God longs for us to move from success to significance.  It's not about you/us!  Our culture says it's ALL about us...so this is counter-cultural.  You won't find satisfaction for living for yourself.  God did not wire us to live this way and we will always have a hole in our heart until we realize this.

3.  Save us by HIS grace:  We can't buy our way into Heaven.  We don't deserve to be saved.  Jesus, who is perfect, came to do.  He will give us His grace.  God gives us what we need, not what we deserve.  Grace says I'm going to take your problem and make it my problem.  God's Riches At Christ's Expense (GRACE).  Eph 2:8  "It is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this is not from yourselves, it is a gift from God..."  God gave us the greatest gift.  He sent us a savior.

A Time for Reconciliation - Session 3

Celebration - Good news of Great Joy

Salvation - A Savior is born

Reconciliation - "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace good will to men"

RECONCILIATION - Peace on Earth

Where do you need peace in your life this Christmas?

family

friends

taking time out to enjoy what's important

happy

focus on Christ and His birthday

everywhere

No peace in the world until there is peace in the Nations.  Communities won't have peace until peace in families.  There won't be peace in families unless there is peace in individuals and that won't happen unless we allow the "prince of peace" to come into our hearts.

What type of peace does Jesus gives us?  3 kinds

1.  Peace with God - Spiritual peace.  If you are trying to live without God, you are at war with God.  You need a peace treaty with God - you need reconciled with God.  Jesus came to be the bridge...the reconciler between you and God.  When you trust in JESUS, he will make all the conflict go away.  Come on home!  Have you made peace with God?  If you haven't, you need to...one day you will stand before him.  How do you make peace?  Not by promising to be perfect or saying you will never sin.  You make peace by faith.  Faith in God's grace.  Once you make peace with God, you get the 2nd kind of peace...

2.  The peace of God - Emotional peace.  This is the one you need on a daily basis.  Stress goes down in you life, not as angry, things don't bug you as much.  More patient, more joy, more forgiving.  You have the peace of God in your heart.   Phil 4:6.  You have two choices:  Pray or Panic.  Which will it be?  Worship or Worry - Your choice.  worry has never solved a single one of your problems, it doesn't change anything.  Prayer will change things though.  Pray about everything.  Tell God what you need and thank Him for all that He has done.  His peace will guard our hearts and our minds through Christ Jesus.

3.  Peace with others - Relationship with others:  End the war with everyone else.  Be a peacemaker.  2 Corinth 5:18-20.  He is committed to us the message of reconciliation.  God has given us a ministry and a message and it is reconciliation.  Be gracious to others.  Cut people some slack and don't hold them to such a heavy standard.  "Blessed are the Peacemakers, they shall be called the Children of God".  Matt 5:9.  If you know Jesus personally, you are going to be a peacemaker not a troublemaker.  Build people up, don't tear them down.  Love people the way Jesus loves the people.  Christmas is the perfect time to show grace to other people.  

Who do you need to rebuild a broken relationship with this Christmas?  Who do you need to reconcile a relationship with?

If you can't forgive someone, then you need Jesus, which is why you can't forgive.  You need to be filled with the love of Christ in order to let it go.  You are holding it in and it's hurting you.  Some of you are still letting people to hurt you from the past.  This is dumb.  The people of the past cannot hurt you any more unless you hold onto the hurt.  LET IT GO!

You are going to have to let Jesus fill you with His love, so you can love others the way He does.  Let him fill you with HIS forgiveness.  Until you truly feel forgiven, you can't forgive others.  You had some bumps, heartaches and hurts....it's all pointing at this moment right now.

God says:  You matter to me.  I love you, more than you ever know.  I have been watching and waiting for you to love me back your entire life.  I want you to know me.  I want the rest of your life to be the best of your life.  This is the good news of Christmas.  I love you, I'm with you and I'm for you.  I want to save you from your past, for a purpose and save you by my grace for all eternity.  If you let me do that, I will give you the peace between you and me and make you a peacemaker. 

Acts 10:35 - The door is open - if you are ready.

Jesus Christ is God's Christmas gift to you.

Heavenly Father, thank you for Jesus, thank you for all the things you've done for me so far and will continue to do in the future.  Thank you for the peace you have given to me and allowed me to pass on to others.  Continue to build in me the peacemaker heart so that I may glorify you to everyone who I come into contact with. 

*notes from Pastor Rick Warren "Purpose of Christmas"

Getting God's Vision for My Life

The "American Dream" is a dead end.  Having it all, is not enough.  There is more to life than the "goods"...looking good, feeling good.  If we give in to marketing we will be constantly reminded that more is better, that the family on the TV is "normal" and we aren't, to constantly be dissatisfied with our lives.  The media wants to "shake us up" and think, "I need that, I want that, I won't be normal unless I resemble that".

The purpose of your life is not about making money, buying stuff and dying.

If you want long term permanent change it only happens when you change the way you think, change your mindset,  change your vision and your paradigm.  You have to change your relationships to things for it to be long term change.  It's the way you "think" about it.  Changing your behavior only lasts about a month...changing the way you look at things is what creates permanent change.

In the bible, the book of Habakkuk gives us the 7 steps to change our life and get God's vision.

1.  WANT/DESIRE:  HUNGER and THIRST for God's dream.  It's NOT OPTIONAL.    Get that desperate and you WILL hear from Him.  I must want to do God's will.  I choose to do God's will.  It has to be a NECESSITY to you. "God I have to know why I'm here on earth".  "I've got to hear your voice and hear your vision".  "I want to do what you want".  "I want to honor your ways, most of all."
God says, "But these things I plan for your life won't happen right away.  Slowly, steadily and surely the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled.".  Deut: 4.  If you search for God passionately, you will find him.

2.  WITHDRAW:  Get ALONE with God.  God won't speak to you if you have a lot of noise in your life.  You need quiet time every day of your life for the rest of your life.  If you aren't having daily time with God you are not plugged in.  You have NO power in your life which is why you are tired at the end of each day.  You can't withdraw and get alone and get in a quiet place!  God WANTS to meet with you.  He's waiting on you, you aren't waiting on Him.

3.  WAIT - I want, I withdraw and I wait.  I must calm my emotions, call my thoughts if I'm going to hear from God.  Mind operating too fast to hear.


How to Wait on God:
1.  Wait quietly - sit and be quiet
The most important thing you do in your life is to PLUG into God by spending time with him every day.
2.  Wait patiently - find the inner calm and be patient
3.  Wait expectantly - I believe you are going to speak to me.'
4.  I watch in prayer - listen
5.  I write down the ideas that I receive.  Write down clearly what I reveal to you.
6.  Worship- I thank God for speaking to me.  Natural response to hearing God speak to me.

Dear God, help me to give you the best I have.  Help me to want/thirst and hunger for your vision for my life, remind me how important time alone is with you and help me to wait on your response before I act.  Help me to discern in my life where I have fallen short in these areas.  Amen

*notes from Pastor Rick Warren sermon.

Loneliness - Causes and Cures

2 Timothy 4, The last words Apostle Paul ever wrote, he's dying in prison in Rome, he's struggling with loneliness.

4 common causes of loneliness:

1.  Transition - life is a series of transitions.  Any major change can bring on a tinge of loneliness.  Always a loss with every change.  That loss can bring on a little loneliness.  Any life change can bring on loneliness.

2. Separation -   The price of independence is loneliness.  It's rampant in our society because we are separated from those we love for many different reasons.

3. Opposition - when you are under attack by others.  Temptation to build up walls and in order to not let people hurt us again and end up making our self lonelier.

4.  Rejection - When you feel forsaken, abandoned by people you trusted.  We all have a need to be accepted by other people.  When we don't get that it causes enormous pain.  Rejection is the worst thing you can do to a person.  Maybe someone walked out on you.  God cares about the heartache in your heart.  It matters to Him.

You were designed by God for a deep emotional need to be accepted by others.

People who are lonely try getting unlonely by self-defeating ways....like workaholics...so we don't have to think about the lingering pain in our heart.  We think, "If we can just stay busy I can avoid the pain".  Materialism, "I will buy peace".  Sexual escape to compensate for loneliness.  Life becomes a series of one night stands, bar hopping.  Escape into fantasy and try pornography and they dream about a relationship they are dying to have but it's just isn't there and isn't satisfied.

Most people will fall into depression.  They get into a spiral that takes them lower and lower and build buffers around themselves and no one can get around them and they live in a perpetual state of depression.  People build walls around themselves of solitary confinement.  God made us to be in relationship with Him and with others.

What do you do when you go through this season of loneliness?

1.  Utilize your time.  Make the best of a best situation.  Resist the temptation to do nothing.  Take action - any kind of action.  If life gives you a lemon - make lemonade.  Try to think of creative ways to take advantage of the season you are in.  When we are lonely or depressed we don't take care of ourselves very well.  Do the best you can to take care of yourself.  Ask yourself, "What can I do now that will be difficult to do with others now?"

2.  Minimize my hurts - don't rehearse it over and over.  Refuse to become resentful.  Bitterness will eat you up.  Play down the hurt.

3.  Recognize God is presence.  God will not leave us comfortless.  He is with us always even in the end of the world.  We are never really fully alone.

Loneliness is often a FEAR of love.  Afraid to be vulnerable, afraid to step out and risk rejection.  The biggest problem of this fear of love is we don't give ourselves away and we build walls around ourselves.

Loneliness is a time to become better acquainted time with God.  Prayer is a powerful antidote to loneliness.  You can talk to God anytime, anywhere and anyplace.  He cares.  Emphasize others needs.  Focus outward on others and stop focusing on yourself.  Find a ministry where you can use your talents and gifts to help other people.  The loneliness person is a person who is wrapped up in themselves...the selfish and self-centered person.  If you want to break out of loneliness and stop saying "I don't have any friends" and start BEING a friend.  Give yourself away.  See a world that is waiting for friends.  Emphasize other's need.  A lot of loneliness is just a fear of love.  We are afraid to be open, to be vulnerable to share how we really feel and step out and risk a relationship because we may be rejected - when we do this we fear love and we don't give ourselves away.  Stop building walls and start building bridges between you and other people.  TAKE A RISK and begin to help other people.

Regardless of why you feel lonely, God says this to you, "I made you...I put you on this earth for a purpose, I care about you....I LOVE YOU, I have a plan for your life."

The fact is, we expect other people to meet needs in our life that only Jesus Christ can meet.  No man or woman can meet those needs because they are TOO DEEP.  No matter how much a person knows you they will never know you completely like God does.  Loneliness is homesickness for God.

*notes from Pastor Rick Warren, "The Season of loneliness"